i was flying along and singing because the wind was just chilly enough that i noticed the bumps on my arms and the sky was bright and sharp like those early winter mornings before the air thaws and the crystals are still hanging in the air reflecting random sunlight...i needed to go faster to make my appointment but i wanted also to spend this time with God and this small part of his creation, adoring and admiring and listening for him to say "did you notice this little bit over here..." and laughing with my hair streaming like those models underwater while Jesus was reminding me how he loved me and holding my hand and supporting me in each moment and singing along with me (his voice is a very rich baritone when he sings and he says though he didn't always like everything frank sang he thought that particular version of 'my way' was the best ever recorded on earth -- and let's face it, when Jesus sings 'my way' you have to see the humor in it)

where was i

flying along, thinking about how nice it felt just being there with the three of them, enjoying the sun and the wind and the amazing view along the coastline, i asked Jesus why he made the cliffs like that and how he got the four or five different shades of brown there and he explained it all so simply and so beautifully and i knew there was no way i could relay it to anyone else and i knew he didn't care if anyone else ever saw it and though he didn't say so he might have made it just for that moment between the four of us and i almost cried because when he says i love you you know it's true and you can see the holes in his side and hands and feet and he's so freaking cool...he's grown his hair out since the cross a little, he told me, and he said he likes the way it looks though maybe a bit more waviness would be good because it's getting so thick and i just laugh and laugh and i wonder if he'll have you combing it again like last time we picnicked with him and he smiles that knowing way, teasing me, like when you share a joke with him that i don't get and the two of you are laughing silently at me but i never get mad because i always feel so secure in his love for me

i asked him how NJ was coming and he said the walls were almost finished painting and there were still a few streets that needed pouring and he said the Holy Spirit hadn't really decided which pattern of brick would work best in that neighborhood because there were so many families and they all wanted to enjoy the preferences of their friends over their own and he was thinking of a type of mosaic and i laughed and asked how Zipporah was doing

you were waiting with your feet in the water and the girls climbing an olive tree that looked a thousand years old...i love it when we picnic in the afternoon